.......dog barf.....whew.
Those are lifted directly from the book Non Campus Mentis, which is a collection of hundreds of those bad metaphors and other grammatical and historical inaccuracies by high school and college students.
My favorite:
"Genghis Khan tried to conquer earth, but then he was frozen, and when we was thawed, Captain Kirk kicked his ass."
Winner:
20. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.
Winner:
20. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.
isn't this a simile?
aren't most of those on the list similes?
It took quite a while to get the visual of a vegetable soup-filled Hefty bag out of my head...that's how good some of these were.
That you, Phil?
Metaphor
–noun
1. a figure of speech in which a term or phrase is applied to something to which it is not literally applicable in order to suggest a resemblance, as in “A mighty fortress is our God.”
2. something used, or regarded as being used, to represent something else; emblem; symbol.
Simile
–noun
1. a figure of speech in which two unlike things are explicitly compared, as in “she is like a rose.”
2. an instance of such a figure of speech or a use of words exemplifying it.
Based on the Random House Unabridged Dictionary, © Random House, Inc. 2006.